Are you listening?
I go on kicks where I like to go to the swap-meet and then there are times you couldn’t drag me to one. Lately I have gone a few times. Inevitably I come across a few odd or outright weird [or weird-looking] items. Some items are complete mysteries, not just to me, but also to the one selling them.
I took a trip to the swap-meet Saturday morning specifically to look for fun, weird or cool things for this post, so without further ado, here are 13 things I didn’t bring home from the swap-meet…
1. Crazy Patterned Stretch Pants
I’m all for a nice pair of stretch pants, but these, I just don’t understand. There is so much going on it makes me queasy. I don’t care what you wear with these, I would still hate them.
2. Great Scarves, Badly Thought Out Design
I really likes these scarves. I did, but then I realized I would be constantly catching my jewelry on all of those little loops. Look!
So, I passed on the scarves.
3. Life Size Darth Vader Movie Poster
I liked Star Wars as much as the next person, but I’m 45 and this is not the man I want to see standing over me when I wake up at night. And please don’t tell me he’s my father too!
I happily left Darth Vader — aka Anakin Skywalker, behind.
4. Pick a Throne, Any Throne
This was a first. I Have not previously seen a row of Johns at the swap-meet…unless the porta-potties count?
The icing on that cake was when I turned up the very next aisle…
5. Don’t Forget to Wipe!
I didn’t bring any home, but now I know where to go when sh** hits the fan!
6. Not My Size
I have seen these there a few times and the people keep saying they were getting more sizes…
They got more colors, but not more sizes. Foiled again. I want these boots dagnabbit!
7. Still Marching Without a Drum
You probably didn’t know, but I play hand drums, aka loose drums. In other words not a drum “kit”. Think Bongos etc.
I have been looking specifically for a drum or two and this toy drum was all they had so I beat it.
No really, I got out of there.
8. Hot Lips Radio
I’m sure there is some explanation for this that is escaping me, but like I said, it is escaping me.
By the way, does anyone know what the “motion” button is for? Do I want to know?
9. My What a Big Face You have
I’m not really sure what this was. Initially as I approached I thought it was carved wood, it isn’t. Instead it is made out of some kind of resin. It was huge, nearly half my height.
I wouldn’t want it in my house, bit it would look cool in a yard if I lived in the woods.
10. The Sea of Bras
Although some of these were pretty, they are swap-meet bras and not going to be sufficient for the girls needs. Sigh!
11. What the…?
This little number caught my eye, even though my eye had no idea what it was looking at.
What is this thing? It’s an ab machine called an Ab Circle. Who knew?
Maybe you did…
12. I Almost Knelt to Pray…
When I saw this the first time it was standing like a bridge with the arch at the bottom, so it looked to me like a kneeler. You know, like to kneel down to pray. My dad’s family was catholic, what can i say?
The guy selling it cracked up because what it actually is, is an antique neck massager. The arched part should face up, that is where you rest your neck. Notice the cord?
13. Still the Wrong Drums
All kidding aside, I really wanted to buy this child’s drum kit.
I have a 1-1/2-year-old grand son who would LOVE this. He loves music so much and this would have become his favorite thing however, I am not that stupid.
I love my daughter and she would surely divorce me if I had purchased this for her home.
So, That’s That!
When was the last time you went to a swap-meet? Did find anything fun?